Anyhow, since the last time I posted, a few things transpired...I had a one night stand (of sorts) unfortunately the guy had personality and a brain and he lives 2,000 miles away, so clearly I decided I was going to like him. And since this took place last Saturday, we (I) have gone a full circle on the manic-depressive mental train...so we talked and laughed and I liked him and then I over-shared, then he didn't reply in a timely manner (timely in my world)...then replied and was sweet and I decided I will not make contact first again and since it's been whole 24 hrs that we had contact, I killed him off and this "relationship" is over...over and done, I tell you.
Also, since I have a fully blown shoulder impingement I finally decided I will take some time off crossfit and will do some gentle yoga, acupuncture and stretching. Let's get something straight
CROSSFIT=THERAPY
Today, I went to yoga nidra...it's really just a long (10:45am-12:00pm), guided meditation. Woke up, got ready, open mind and yoga studio bound. Got there with plenty of time to spare, met the instructor (he was missing a leg...I could not help wondering what yoga other than meditation he could teach...I know what you're thinking- You're a bitch!... but it would be very difficult to balance and I am sorry, but this is where my brain went). He helped me set up my "nest" (fold blankets for the utmost comfort while meditating...there is a lot of emphasis on the blanket folding technique in this particular studio...perhaps they should do a workshop on that), anyhow, he mentioned being a type A and a bit OCD while organizing my "meditation area", then left me to feel it out and get comfortable.
He left the room and did not re-enter till 11:03am...did I mention that class was 10:45am-noon??? So now I have anger issues that I didn't when I first arrived... and while he's going through his "breath in and out...feel weightless...let go...just be...let go of the thoughts and constraints...blah, blah, blah" all I can think of was "Get a FUCKING watch...no seriously, OCD and type A's do not pull this crap...this is how you lost your leg, isn't it...you were late for class one too many times"-my brain went on and on and on.
I know what you're thinking "what's the big deal???" and honestly I have no idea...he was a tad late or it was a misprint in the brochure as far as class time (I was trying the whole benefit of the doubt thing), big deal either way...yet I spent a better portion of the class not being able to let go of my rage towards the man that I just met and was nothing but nice to me. And while he was all like "...imagine yourself sinking deeper and deeper into the still dark water..." I was thinking of holding his head under the water for being late to class and then I was grateful that I didn't pay full price for this (Thank you Groupon!!!) as I would be livid (cause I wasn't already)... Does this matter that much in the grand scheme of things you wonder, of course not! Yet for some reason my brain decided to get stuck on that loop and there was nothing I could do to help it.
An hour later, my back hurting, having to go pee and definitely no calmer than I arrived it was over...who leaves relaxing meditation class pissed off and with panties in a bunch?! I DO! Meditation...not so much...perhaps I should try medication...meh.
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